Today has been one of those days. I barely got anything done that I am paid to do. I did stand around and talk to people and drink coffee all morning. Late in the morning after returning to my desk my cubicle-mate said she had thought I was in a meeting. I clarified for her, "No, I was wandering around the office talking to Ted, then Brandon, then Sean." After fumbling at my desk for half an hour I left for "lunch" and did errands around town and visited my mother-in-law.
~Sigh, sorry, this is taxing to recall.
The cubicle-mate reminds me that our self-reviews are due by Friday. Now reviews are truly awful torture implements devised by corporations to force workers to document how successful they have been at their jobs the past year and if they have completed a small list of extra-curricular activities to prove they are worthy of being promoted into middle management. And as if this is not nauseating enough, all these activities must align with the CEO's goals for the company, so before you can even begin to write your self-review you must complete a couple hours of research to see what you are aligning with.
God I do have to complete the damn thing by Friday...
Since I wasn't working anyway I emailed a friend I had not been in contact with for over a year, "Hey! Wondering how you're doing?!"
Her response a couple hours later, "Good. Busy with work. How are you?"
I contemplate a response, and think and type and backspace, "Good. Adjusting to it getting dark so early."
End of conversation. So an afternoon with spurts of work comes to a close with me reading some white papers on the internet, a last gasp attempt at self-improvement before packing up and heading home.
I check my personal email. There is an email from Facebook. A college friend whom I had left a "Happy Birthday! You're kids are cute!" message on his wall responded with, "They are fun, when can they see their Aunt?!" Now I haven't seen this person in years and I'm wondering if this is the kind of correspondence that should be taking place on his Facebook wall. What do I say? Yeah, let's get together? Is that correct? Does everyone on Facebook need to know? What if I respond inappropriately and then everybody sees what I wrote?
Oh I don't know and I'll never figure it out.
To round out the day, the husband delivers the message that he would feel less stressed out if I could get my own friends and then do things with them.
Blah, blah, blah.
So, at the half-way point of my life, I'm not in high school, I'm not starting a career, I'm not raising any kids, nothing....but I've still got a boat-load of shit I'm trying to figure out.
Thank goodness the sweet husband recorded a bunch of episodes of Being Human, it's a good frickin' show. It's deep, multi-layered. I'm lying on the couch watching it by myself, re-grouping so I can tackle tomorrow.
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